Spin-No-Matic 2000   
 

It’s three a.m. in a bedroom at the White House, and after an evening of pretzels and fruit juice the president is having trouble sleeping
BUSH:
No, nah, Karl? Karen? Conan?

Dream sound

Karl
arhhhhhh!
Karen
I know Karl, but this time we really have it fixed
Karl
We better have. Our poll numbers are tanking and people are actually beginning to listen to what he says.
Karen
OH My God.
Karl
We must bring order from chaos.
Karen
Herr Rove—just listen. The boss says.

Bush tape: “the one thing I learned in Vietnam ...”-
We push one button on the Spin-no-matic 2000 and listen to what comes out.

Spin:
The president doesn’t mean to imply that he was ever physcially in Viet Nam, only that he once met some colorful vietnam fisherman on Galveston Bay, a memory that he will forever treasure..

Karl:
How about that!!Amazing
What a beautiful voice...like buttermilk strained thru your old brassere

Karen
Watch the hands!

Karl
But Can he take the heavy stuff, play with the big boys?

Karen
Hang on to your  trenchcoat.

Tape 2
Republican mission Statement.
 

KARL
That dumkoff, that’s the Republican Mission Statement, Seal the Files Seal The Files

Karen:
Don’t worry mein liebshen. Listen to the Spinomatic 2000.

You can screw some of the people all the time, all the people, some of the time, And that’s enough.

Karl:
sniff sniff—Call me sentimental, but that’s leadership.

Karen Hughes
You old softie.

Karl
Can it handle when the president’s ..er... how you say??? doing pretzels??

Karen
Salted or Bavarian? Take it ...
 

American Compass

Ask not what your country can do for you, Ask what you can do for me personally.

Karl
Wundibar!

Karen
WE better get this to Novak

Karl
Novak—that reminds me.